I wanted to say Thanks to those who have commented and emailed and called after my post on the Falling Beauty the other day. Your kindness is so very much appreciated right now.
To update on my Mum she has had a bad fall and broken her shoulder, she is in a bad way. My heart goes out to her. I was not there at her side when they took her to hospital because I knew nothing of her plight. I only found out a couple of days ago when the care home got worried that nobody had called or come to see her after the accident. They had left a message for my brother and he did nothing. On speaking to him I discovered that he had forgotten to call back. Now some of my more charitable friends have said that he might be having a hard time coping with mum’s slipping away this year. I am having a hard time coping with him. He lives barely a 15 minute walk from the care home. I am on the other side of the country.
One of my dearest friends sent me an email the other day. She said that when a parent is slowly leaving us and seemingly clinging to a hellish existence for no apparent reason, they can actually be doing this as a sort of last lesson they can teach us. The lesson of humility and compassion.
This pulled me up short and really hit hard. You see before my Dad died he was in a wheelchair and was not the easiest of characters. We always had a hard relationship and I was accused by my mum many times for lacking in compassion.
I guess now she is teaching me the true meaning of the word. Mum I am learning it every day.
This hasn’t helped my own situation and I admit I am struggling a bit here. I don’t want a pity party but felt I owed it to you to let you know why the blog is a bit patchy at the moment, I am doing my best.
Today I go to visit mum and en route will have a meeting with my publisher and collect the first copies of the book that will be for sale. This is such a big moment, it will be available in shops by the end of next week and we have made fabulous pre release sales. I should be jumping for joy. I only wish I could.