The other day I decided to trade in the old fruit (Blackberry) and get a new phone. I decided it was time to embrace the touch screen, mega app world and all the new technology of Samsung smart phones.
“Oh it’s so easy to use”, “You’ll have it set up in no time”. Why do those sort of sentences ring bells of doom in my ears? Sue lends me her “Android For Beginners” book and I am coping quite well apart from a wee bit of a problem getting internet and emails sorted out, but I’m sure the kind lady at Virgin has now forgiven my tearful outburst and stressed out ramblings, surely there are others as inept as I?
Texts flying, twitter tweeting, emails fluttering in and out. Boy am I confident, I’ve even taken a few snaps and dared to download an app or two. However there is one thing I haven’t done – I haven’t answered the phone yet.
That was until yesterday afternoon.
There I was out on the deck at HQ typing away in the sunshine, really on a roll with the book and wondering what the funny ringing noise was in the distance. Checked the phone in HQ, not ringing, went back to typing. Still ringing. Suddenly realise that it is my mobile which is sitting in useless position on kitchen table.
Scamper to house and answer only to find I’ve missed the call. Can’t get at said call and end up having to go online for info as to how to get the message. Phone rings again as I am doing this. I press the green phone handset icon on the screen as I assume (never, ever assume!!!) this is how one answers a phone. Alas not. Nothing happens, well the bloody phone keeps ringing on and on as I desperately try to answer it.
Another missed call. This time I get into the system and call back the number. It’s my new publisher wanting a chat to arrange a meeting. Manage to cut him off twice in the course of the conversation due to my ineptitude with the phone.
Abandon phone and back to typing. Phone rings again. This time I’m on the case like a shot and start grappling with the thing. I’ve checked the manual online and it says to drag the handset icon to the dot. Can’t find the bloody dot. Panicking now and finger flying all over the screen. I have to say I am now muttering maybe a few slightly less than ladylike words as I press and slide and practically dance on the damn screen. Suddenly I hear a distant voice, OMG it’s worked, I’ve answered the phone. Unfortunately it is the BBC and the first thing they hear at my end is “Oh s*&t, sodding phone, help!”.
Laughter on the other end as the producer asks if I’m okay. Cannot admit that I don’t know how to answer my own phone so mutter something about tripping over the steps. “Well if you’re still upright can you come in and do the show on Friday and talk about sun damage in the home?”. Agree that this is a fine idea and we make plans. I only cut him off once during the conversation so I guess I’m making progress.
Sometimes I long for the old fashioned phone in the corner to tinkle into life and things to be simpler…….