I have so much I want to say to you. This is the first time in my life that I have not seen you on this special day. I want to tell you about Idgy’s latest adventures, about how wonderful she is and what a help she has been while I’ve been trapped here on the sofa. You wouldn’t believe our girl, that baby you are holding in your arms in the photo, she has brought in wood, built the fire, cooked meals, cleaned and washed, even done the ironing. Most of all she has hugged her Mum when it all got too much and I couldn’t cope. She put on a smile and wrapped me in her arms and said it would be okay.
You would be so proud of her Mum. You always were. I wish you could see how beautiful she is, how clever and kind, see her amazing drawings and hear her enthusiasm when she talks of her favourite things. I wish you could see her grin and hear her laugh at The Big Bang Theory on TV.
You always said she was someone special and you were right. I am so lucky to have her in my life, but dearest Mum I do so wish I still had you too.
For all the years, for all the tears. For the words, for the smile I loved to see, for days in sunshine, for shopping and gin and tonics, for white wine and Marbella, for Les Mis and girls days out, for apple pie and mince and potatoes, for everything in my head and heart.
Words are not enough. I write this and set it free in the world for all to see and hope that you will read this and know that today of all days my heard fills with love for you and how I wish I could celebrate it with you as we have always done.
They always say that a mother is irreplaceable. They are right, no matter what the arguments, tears and tantrums down the years, that bond with Mum is so strong. Just knowing she is there somewhere is the reassurance even the oldest of us children need to get us through the tough times. When she is no longer there the aching well of loss can overwhelm. So if you are reading this somewhere out there in cyberspace please take one thing from my tear soaked words – love your Mum and cherish every minute you have on this earth with her.
So I sign off here, my Mothers Day wish to you dear Mum, that you should know with certainty just how much I love you and miss you and wish with all my heart that you were here.