Here are my boys Berti (brown one) and Hank. This is a very special photo as they are both in the basket together. Normally there is a bit of fistycuffs when one or other tries to get into the basket when his pal is already in there. Idgy and l call this their handbag fights. They always look as if they are mincing about and swinging a handbag at eachother in a somewhat camp way. Far to much posing and dancing to be a serious fight.
'Okay Mum what gives?' The peaceful cat nap is over, time to step back and put the camera away before they get up and spoil the moment.
PHONEPHOBE someone who is utterly hopeless with mobile phones and really shouldn't be allowed anywhere near them.
I admit it, l am that 'phonephobe'. I am so completely useless that on Sunday l lost the plot with my mobile completely and threw it accross the kitchen. Not content with that l then stamped on it. Ok l was having a bit of a tantrum and the damn phone wouldn't work. Things just got out of hand – well the phone certainly left my hand swiftly! I am not condoning my behavour, far from it. It was childish and stupid, as was pointed out by Idgy who is ten.
The phone was broken (obviously) and l had to go and buy a new one. Yesterday l headed for Tesco and looked at their lovely sellection of nasty little ringing gadgets called phones. They mocked me in their cheerful display with easy to read symbols showing off their prowess in bluetooth (their dentistry is of no interest to me), MP3 playing, networks and cameras. I glared at them. All l wanted was something completely idiot-proof that wouldn't switch itself on when it felt like a bit of company. I spotted one at the bottom of the display with no gadgets and fancy symbols, in fact it said 'easy to use handset' – thats the man for me! The fact that it was only £30 was even better. I carried it to the cash desk in triumph. It is at this point that l overhear the sales lady telling another customer that is they spend £25 on their food shopping they get £25 off any mobile over £50. Hmmmm a bargain. I trot off and do the shopping and return with a groaning trolly. I then spend a further half hour looking at the phones again to find a better one that l can get the discount on. All thoughts of the cheapo idiot proof phone are now gone, l am overcome with lust for something better. Like a magpie my eye is drawn to the shiny one on the top row. 'Is it simple to use' l ask the sales lady. What a stupid question Karon, of course she said yes. But at this point l have fallen in love with the LG Shine and l have to have it. I get said phone for the same price as my original idiot-proof cheapo. I carry it from the shop in triumph.
You will have guessed that l have forgotten by now that l am a phonephobe, yes it has slipped my mind. I am all wrapped up in the shiny glow of my new toy. I get it home and Idgy practically groans when she sees it, 'try not to break it' she says. I spend the entire evening playing with my phone, l even manage to make my first call to Tesco to register it. Actually l am having to phone them to ask where the number is as l don't have a clue where to look. 'Try the box' said the chap on the other end – hhhhmmmmmm what a stupid place to put a phone number. I have even tried to use the camera on it, had to give that up as it took me 20 minutes to switch it off again. I will learn about that later (heard that before) in meantime l have put in some phone numbers and realised l lost most in the loss of phone the other day. Ho hum, so if you usually hear from me by phone/text and don't (Jacky) phone me at home and give me your number again.
My shiny new phone will look pretty and shiny and make a few calls and very probably never have to divulge the secrets of its MP3 player or other such delicate and personal details. As long as it does what it is told and doesn't switch itself on when it feels like it, l feel we will get along fine.
I live in hope……….